A Requiem For Every Hope

eden_rose @ 2009-12-17T05:04:00

2009-12-17T10:04:54Z

http://kxwaal.tripod.com/kxwaal-nights.in.white.satin.mp3

eden_rose @ 2008-08-15T04:22:00

2008-08-15T08:25:01Z

She Shifts Blame

She shifts blame once more;
From “hers...” to “theirs...” to “mine...”
Bringing fists of doubt upon me;
In words we'll both refuse to find

“Where will it end?” I beg her;
A sense of sentiment lost
“Not here again!” she offers;
Vacancy, her retort, my loss

reminders litter all three sides
your eye's are a confessional
but you know anyhow
im indifferent now to what you think you find

my white flag's held down
your will stains
cutting teeth on what could remain
and i for one, dont wanna know
what you would bring
what you could become

She shifts blame once more;
From “mine...” to “theirs...” to “hers...”
I say “I cannot help but find your insecurities vain”;
Then I offer: “Not here again!”

You know, I try not to think it but I get a vague sense sometimes;
I get this real vague sense.
That the effort i make for love;
Would be better used in self-defense.

when you ask
cognitive collapse
it never happened
when you answer
cognitive collapse
it never happened
i'm having trouble rationin'
a pace i didn't think could last
just did
cognitive collapse
it never happened

lie, just for today
she'll take it out, then she'll shift blame
just bring me there again
she'll take it out, then she'll shift blame

lie, just for today
she'll take it out, then she'll shift blame
just bring me there again
she'll take it out, then she'll shift blame

eden_rose @ 2008-05-05T02:46:00

2008-05-05T06:47:40Z

I'm not looking so great lately...

Loki Is Pisssssed.

2008-04-11T21:28:09Z

FUUUUCK

2008-03-27T18:30:17Z

You fucks aren't helping fast enough. I'm at 31 votes - The guy in lead has about ten thousand, though he's rumoured to be cheating.
http://parisbff.com/people/KxWaal
http://parisbff.com/people/KxWaal
http://parisbff.com/people/KxWaal
http://parisbff.com/people/KxWaal
Remember you can vote daily.
This show will be 382093 times better with me getting drunk and headbutting someone.

V O T E O R D I E !

2008-03-26T04:35:56Z

Everyone MUST vote for me to become Paris Hilton's new best friend.
Apparently this is some new reality show or something:
http://parisbff.com/people/KxWaal
Vote for me. Because I'm awesome

I had to put my location as Port Huron, Michigan since they don't allow non-Americans...
Luckily I have dual-American-Canadian citizenship - so WHEN I win, I can just move there.

If you don't vote for me, you aren't my friend.
You already failed me back when I ran for Prime Minister a couple years back. Assholes.

I Am Better Than You

2008-03-20T15:07:19Z

Not sure if I mentioned I was in St. Louis or not, well I am and I'm awesome. St.Louis is an adult open door school.
Most of the people there are retards - but I put up with them because I now want to go to university, if only as a big "fuck you" to those who have doubted me.

...so far in my gr.12 english class (university level):

-English Essay: 4+ (I had completely forgotten about the 1-4 system, 4+ is like an A+)

-English Unit 1 test: 45/47

I AM SMARTERERERER THAN YOU YOU STUPID SLUTS!

--------------

In other news - the laptop I borrowed money from my Mom for. The one I NEED for note taking etc. in class due to my disability - Well the backlight went out on it and now I'm fucking screwed.

This is why I can't have nice things.
Whenever I have a little bit of sunshine come into my life - God decides he'll have none of it and comes to mushroom-slap the cheer right out of head.
I hate you motherfuckers.

Haiku

2008-03-02T04:58:56Z

My blender has broke
It fell mid-milkshake making
Milk, ice cream remain

I stir it by hand
My wrists and spirit in pain
The counter's sticky

When I have finished
The milk's sour anyhow
March, cold and alone

A true story.
Fuck Ahren's Convenience and fuck you.

eden_rose @ 2008-02-28T00:12:00

2008-02-28T05:12:12Z

http://www.dragcity.com/mp3/dc363nhaliwp.mp3

Day Of The Dead Remake = Blasphemy.

2008-02-12T07:47:51Z

I just finished watching the Day Of The Dead remake. It was recently leaked onto the internet - I'm sure you could find it if you looked - But don't.

It was soooo fucking terrible that it inspired me to write my first ever film review for IMDB.com - The review is currently pending approval, so I'll post it here.
It's pretty damn scathing... And long....

I would have used a LOT more profane language, if I wasn't trying to get IMDB to post it.
DO NOT SEE THIS FUCKING MOVIE! If you haven't seen the original classic, DO rent it!

This film offended me as a Romero fan, this film offended me a zombie movie fan and this film offended me as a human being. This film was so terrible, in fact, that it inspired me to write my first ever IMDB review.

I will start off by saying that I'm not even sure how this can be called a "remake" of the original Dawn Of The Dead. I don't see how this could be called a "re-imagining" of the film either, for that matter....

The original film starts off in a post-apocalyptic world. The dead have been rising from their graves to eat the flesh for some time now for an unknown reason. In an almost "Omega Man" theme, the characters of the film fear they are the last humans alive on earth. They live together in an underground military bunker as three distinct groups of people in general disharmony with each other - the scientists who wish to understand the problem, the soldiers, who wish to destroy the problem and the civilians who simply wish to enjoy whatever bit of their life is left to enjoy.

Much of the conflict in the film, in fact, involves the characters interactions with each other rather than their interaction with the zombies. The original Dawn Of The Dead had a very bleak, claustrophobic atmosphere to it that is responsible for it being my favourite of Romero's "Dead" films. The vast majority of the film takes place in the military bunker, as it is the only refuge from the carnage surrounding them. They leave only to gather the dead as "specimens" for scientific study and to look for survivors.

This "remake" has none of this. None. The film starts at the beginning of the outbreak, for one. Also, a reason for this outbreak is later given in the film. The outbreak is also contained to one city for the duration of the film, it is not world-wide. While they do end up in an underground military bunker, it is only toward the end of the film. The rest of it they are running all over the place and there are people all over the city, completely missing the themes and indeed, the entire basis of the original. There are scientists, zombies and soldiers - but their function in the plot is completely changed. The true enemies are not the other people in this one, it's definitely the zombies.

They did bring back the idea of the "sympathetic" zombie, Bub, however he is not been "tamed" like in the original - Instead he is docile and non-threatening because, get this: he was a vegetarian during his life. They then explain that he kept this trait through becoming one of the undead. Hearing this made me feel like I was going to cry. It was THE most terrible concept I have ever witnessed unfold in cinema. - And I'm a huge fan "so bad it's good" B grade horror.

As far as I'm concerned, this film is a remake in title only. Nothing else has any more in common with Day Of The Dead than it does with any other zombie film. In my honest opinion, naming the film this was a shameless, almost criminal attempt at a cash-grab. They were hoping to sucker in poor die-hard horror fans like myself, who would feel almost "obliged" to see such a remake if it were made.

Wow. I can't believe I've made it this far into my criticism of this being called a remake without mentioning "running zombies". Believe me, that really hurt too - But the Dawn Of The Dead remake was guilty of this crime, too... And as much as I hate to admit it, that remake wasn't all that bad. So I'll leave my zombie elitism out of this.

If this film was not marketed as a remake of Day Of The Dead, it would have fared considerably better among critics and fans alike.... However, that's not to say that this movie wasn't terrible as yet another 28 Days Later clone, either...

The acting was god-awful with the exception of (maybe) Mena Suvari. Stale lines, even more stale delivery.

Nick Cannon's role as Salazar was tasteless. He provided a "token black character" for the film in that he was given such stereotypical one-liners that they verged on outright racism... How many times do we need to hear a black character say the "Man, that's some (fill-in-the-blank) shit, right there!" line in a film until it's not funny anymore?
My personal favourite was when, in response to someone saying they were a doctor, Salazar said "Maan.. Ain't nobody here wanna hear that CSI bullshit!".
I was honestly speechless.
I find such a stereotypical portrayal of an African-American character kind of ironic in this film, being that Romero's Night Of The Living Dead was one of the first mainstream films to give the lead "hero" role to a black man.

The film overall, while extremely fast-paced, somehow managed to loose my attention consistently throughout. I found myself struggling to pay attention just so I could write this review to warn you people.
In the world of zombie films, this one honestly makes "Children Of The Living Dead" look like "Zombi 2".

GARBAGE DAY!!!

2008-02-11T02:26:59Z

The only scene from Silent Night, Deadly Night: Part 2 you really need to see:

http://www.badmovies.org/multimedia/moviesl/silentnightii1.mpg

I love this fucking movie.

------------------------------------------------------------

EDIT:

I found this, it has his entire rampage, so you can see the above vid in context...

http://youtube.com/watch?v=8xh7junyB2o

...And by "in context", i mean that you can see it has absolutely no context...

That movie is pure gold... Over 40% of it consists of flashbacks from Silent Night Deadly Night Part 1...

According to the directors commentary, they originally asked him to simply re-cut the first film so could just re-release the fucking thing as a sequel - But I guess the director felt bad cheating the audience that much...
But yeah, no word of a lie - nearly half of it is just the entire storyline of the first film shown in flashbacks.

Meeting The Singer Of GLASS TIGER!

2008-02-04T16:13:54Z

I just finished writing out this story for my facebook. It happened about a year ago, during my time without internet. It kicks ass, so I'll post it here, too...
I have tons of stories like this.
From now on whenever my life is uneventful, I'll just tell y'all a story and reminisce about how much ass I've kicked.

This picture really begs for the story behind it.

I was on a bunch of E pills when my friends had to go home, so I met up with my friend Joey at the Fiddlers Green.
Upon arriving there, I was informed by a waitress that a few of the members of Glass Tiger were over here, enjoying a few drinks after their show at the Kitchener Auditorium or something...

You may remember Glass Tiger from that "Dont Forget Me When I'm Gone" song they did.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=JfeNQJWkhH8

Of course, being drunk and rolling, I immediately went over and started talking to him.
I went about acting like I was a big fan, asking how the tour was going etc.... Dude (I later found out he was the singer) was a total dick to me, if i remember... he seemed to see my thinly-veiled indifference to him and his music.

After being brushed off by him so he could go back to his 30-something slut-ass groupie (what slut in her right mind is a Glass Tiger groupie?), I got pissed. By this time, the Corona in my system was enough to erase my MDMA-induced good-will.

First, I reapproached him with some pretty blond girl I met that night. I layered on the "star struck fan" thing even more thickly. I found out he was working on a solo project and began telling him that I should do some remixes for him. I asked him if he'd pose for a picture with me, blond chick took it. I remember him giving an odd look at my "devil horns" hand sign...

Then I looked him right in his washed-up eyes and said "I was looking on the jukebox over there, and I couldnt find any of your music - That's funny, because even fucking Chumbawumba is on the jukebox."

He gave me some sort of washed-up dirty look and went back to his sluts.

Later, I found out Glass Tiger had opened for Loverboy... This prompted me to approach him again and say "You OPENED for fucking Loverboy!?!" then I said something retarded like "Loverboy, more like boy lover!".

Luckily, Joey knew people that worked there - All of whom thought I was hilarious, so i wasn't kicked out.

Some member of the Glass Tiger crew came up and asked me why I was causing a scene. I said "Well, because dude is a dick and he's acting all like he don't suck". One of the Glass Sluts had followed him up there.

I naturally began hitting on this twice-my-age Glass Slut immediately.
I pointed out that Glass Tiger were a shitty band, that they werent on the jukebox and that she should come hang out with me if she didn't want aids.

At this point, singer dude and the rest of his crew left. Quickly.
So quickly that singer dude forgot his jacket! I immediately scooped this up as some sort of prize. It was bought at Le Chateau, is twice my size and is still in my closet.

I yelled, "I'll forget him when he's gone!"
Then I immediately donned this jacket, went to the front of the bar and lead a group of thirty-something frat boys in singing "Dont Forget Me When I'm Gone".

It was a defining moment in my life.
This is a true story, you can ask Joey Blake if you know him
I miss being that awesome.

INRI

2008-01-22T05:58:03Z

23? Fuck That!

2008-01-09T21:55:18Z

Sooo... Jen ditched me.
I swear, that girl doesn't even LIKE me...

Luckily, as soon as I got there Corey gave me a 40 of Colt 45...
Then Paul gave me a tall can of Busch...
Then Corey gave me mushrooms (a birthday tradition, it seems)
Then everyone gave me shots.

Yes, I did end up SMOKING CHEESE AGAIN! This time, it was pizza cheese.
Corey smoked with me this time. This is a new tradition.
We all agreed that next year, everyone's doing cheese buckets.

I was supposed to go to Trevor's court date today.
But I was hungover and Jen ditched me again today and I generally wasn't feeling it'd be a good idea to make myself more depressed.
Oh well, I fully expect him to be looking forward to at least 3429 more court dates in the future... Murder cases drag on a loooooong time.

Rachel, you'd better fucking get me that Arby's - I neeeeeed it.

Tonight, I'm gunna watch SLAVE TO THE CANNIBAL GOD(1978)
A review will follow if i'm not too drunk to remember.

I'M TWENTY FUCKING THREE.

2008-01-08T18:32:01Z

It's my birthday. I can't believe I'm 23. I'm gunna die soon. Someone hoooold me.

I'm poor and my parents are gone to the Caribbean or something...
Someone come bring me cake and drugs.

Last year, I was all high on mushrooms and we got Pinky to bake me a cake - We were lacking half the ingredients and she put fucking jube-jubes in it, but the effort was nice. I wasn't terribly hungry on account of the shrooms anyhow - I more so just wanted a cake, I didnt want to eat it.

Later that night I smoked cheese-string... seriously. There's a video.

If Jen doesn't at least come visit me today, i'mmma gunna slap her.

Oh Shit.

2007-12-30T23:43:49Z

It's weird using this account again. I haven't used the screenname "Eden Rose" in yeaaars.

People are always asking me what I am or have been up to...
This can generally be summed up as follows:
Girlfriend, marijuana, music, being awesome.

I don't really leave my apartment too much anymore because the internet has made real life interaction seem obsolete and tedious.

My girlfriends name is Jen, she's young, beautiful and she hates me. I like that.

My music is terrible.
http://myspace.com/kwaal (my 'main' project)
http://myspace.com/cuthroatthepirate (my rap group)

I also watch a lot of movies these days. Mostly Italian or B-rated gore-fests.

One of the more recent ones was HARD ROCK ZOMBIES (1985)
In it, a hard rock band (the singer of which has a mustache) go to play a show in a mysterious town. After repeated, overlooked warnings to leave by a young girl, they are murdered.
Then the girl plays a recording of some song the band recorded that was "based after an ancient ritual" (no further explanation given nor needed).
This causes to band to come back to life as... HARD ROCK ZOMBIES!
Then fucking ADOLPH HITLER himself shows to be behind the awful goings on in this town, honestly.

I give it 25 out of a possible 37 stars.
Next, I'm going to watch BARN OF THE NAKED DEAD(1974)

My new rap song is the single most earth-shattering thing to happen to hip hop since the Biggie Smalls murder.

Again, the address is http://myspace.com/cuthroatthepirate

Not since the Beatles has an artist brought such talents to the table. Indeed, "They Call Me K-Waal" is truly one of the great symphonies of our time.
After a week on the top spot, it is currently charting at number 2 in my pants.

My Comments On The "Christmas Card Killing" (The media dubbing it that is disgusting)

2007-12-20T19:35:07Z

Trevor Lapierre and I were best friends for many, many years.
I'm 22 now and we met when I was about 15.
My comments will be appearing in todays issue of the KW Record.
We began to drift about a year ago when his increasingly unstable mental health became too much for me to deal with. While we did stay in touch over this time, not being there to help him will go on to be one of my biggest regrets.

I had to watch his slow decent into an undiagnosed mental illness. I witnessed him become intoverted, nihlistic and slowly less in touch with reality. He began talking to himself. He would speak incoherently, when he spoke at all, which was rare for him towards the end.
He later would confide in me that he heard voices. He said these voices were of demons.... That they'd taunt him, tell him to hurt people. I'm not sure I'll ever know why I never told anyone about this.

The Trevor that used to spend the night at my place almost every weekend four years back when I still lived with my Mom is not the same Trevor that did this terrible and unmotivated attack. The Trevor I knew was an artist and a filmmaker with a great deal of potential. He was a good humoured guy - we were always joking around. We'd record funny little songs for fun, that kind of thing.

You can say what you will about the man. If dismissing him as a waste of life and simple scum allows you to see a more black and white, sterile view of the world - all the power to you.
But I think to de-humanize the man is a disservice to the victim, to Trevor and to those who would wish to understand what brings a man to do something like this.

eden_rose @ 2007-12-12T06:23:00

2007-12-12T11:27:23Z

Anyone still use this shit?
I've been thinking of using it again, perhaps...
Will anyone read?
If I get at least 2 comments on this post, I will.

I swear, it'll be less emo this time 'round...

~

2006-12-16T14:05:37Z

Fuck Gin, And Fuck All Of You
Loki Would Kill You All If He Could.

~

2006-11-14T22:02:10Z

My phone doesn't work. I need a phone.
I hate you motherfuckers. I hate you motherfuckers. I hate you motherfuckers.

~

2006-08-12T04:41:16Z

I'm still alive, just never around a computer with the internet...
I need a wireless internet card then i'll be online - anyone wanna give me $30? =D
My appartment is very nice.
About 80% of what I eat is deep-fried... I'll probably have a heart attack soon...
I'm kinda lonely...
Someone come brush my hair and love me...
My cell phone works again: (519)616-9227
I'll make you my new speciality - Deep-fried hotdogs with deep-fried onions...
it's damn good.

~

2006-07-28T20:58:46Z

I'll have an appartment August 1st.
Fuck y'all hoes.

101010111010001110101010

2006-07-15T20:24:14Z

Canada has one of the highest homeless rates per capita of any developed nation. In fact, in Toronto, admissions to
homeless shelters increased by a shocking 75% between 1988 and 1998. Seventy-five fucking percent.

While there are many sources of this problem, the largest is a lack of affordable housing. Over the course of the 1980s the government of Brian Mulroney significantly reduced the amount of low-income-geared homes built each year. In the 1994 federal budget brought in by the new government of Jean Chrétien almost completely halted these federal housing programs. In 1995 the Ontario government of Mike Harris did the same, ensuring that in Ontario virtually NO subsidized housing would be constructed for the next decade.

Something has to be done. I swear to god that even if I find a home from now on I must fight for those who don’t (with the exception of those who are homeless out of a life-style choice). AFFORDABLE HOUSING NOW!

Anyhow, I’ve decided to start a journal of my time homeless – hopefully it’s interersting and not just a four-page hog of your livejournal friends page.

………………………………………………………………………………..

Monday:
Apon my return to town, I run into Julia (chick that smashed the toilet at my old place) – She appologizes for smashing my toilet and upon hearing that I’ve nowhere to go, tells me I can sleep in the tent in the backyard of the place she’s staying at. Paul finds me and her and gives us both a tablet of mdma – these pills were bunk and did very little considering their size. We get to her place and me and her played battleship for a short while before checking out her tent. Upon finding out that there are more earwigs inside the tent then outside, I end up laying down on the reclining lawn chair in her backyard.
My leather jacket as a blanket, my backpack as a pillow - I manage to doze off for about 15 minutes all together. The mild effects of the pill are just enough to keep my mind from aloting any kind of rest. The light drizzle that follows – just enough to be annoying and cold – Ensures that no sleep is found. I couldn’t really leave because I had left my cellphone inside to charge. So upon daylight, I sit and read about 75 pages of Naked Lunch while waiting for her to wakeup. During this time the owner of the house (According to Jullia, a “loon” with bi-polar disorder who’s letting her stay there because she wants Jullia to be a replacement for her late, younger sister) comes outside to do some gardening, she apparently didn’t know I was going to be sleeping in her backyard and a whole spew of akwardness follows. Jullia eventually comes out and then me, her, paul and her father smoke a joint. Jullia’s father falls backwards in his chair. This brightens my day some.

Tuesday:
After many hours of reading Naked Lunch in and about downtown, I finally manage to get ahold of Kyle. We chat it up a bit then sam and casey come over – we go to The Silver Spur and then leave. Casey is passed out on the bed, drunk until we kick him out and Kyle is freaking out because I accidentally over-flowed the toilet. Eventually things calm down and me and Kyle watch “Big Money Hustlers” (best movie ever) and I leave. I end up sitting in the covered area of city hall in order to shelter myself from the insane amounts of rain that were crashing down. I begin reading once more.
An old homeless man runs into this shelter and sits down. He’s about 70 years old, has bushy chin lenth white hair and an insane beard. For about 15 minutes, he’s oblivious to my precence while I sit on the ground near the corner. Eventually he sees me and say’s “hi” – he seems almost like a ventriliquest becaust I can’t see his mouth move from behind all that beard. He asks “are you on the streets, too” and I reply affirmatively. Then he asks me for a smoke, which I give out of the strange sense of comradery I feel for this man. “He’s one of ‘us’”, I think.
Me and this man talk a while. Turns out he’s been homeless more on than off for the better part of 35 years. He offers me a swig of his wine, which I turn down because it’s Sherry (ew). After a few hours of comfortable silence, watching the rain crash down and laughing at a bird hopping around the covered area in circles to avoid the rain, finally daylight hits.
I wander into city hall and sit down. By this time I’m terribly tired so I fall asleep sitting up. Security comes and wakes me. I call my mother and ask if I can come over to clear up some trouble with my cellphone. I fall asleep on her couch and she’s nice enough to let me sleep on her couch for an hour until steve comes home. She gives me $20 she owed me and I leave.

Wednesday:
Again, I sit reading much of the day. By this time I’m done Naked Lunch so I have switched to finishing Please Kill Me, which is about the early New York Punk scene. A story about Iggy Pop laying in a gutter when David Bowie’s limo pulls up and he asks him to come with him to Berlin to record “The Idiot” inspires a similar fantasy of my own.
I run into Paul, pay an outstanding debt with the $20 my mom had given me and then we decide to try some of the lsd that he had bought. We each take one hit. After a couple hours, we felt little effects so Paul decided to just leave to his ex’s for the night. After he left the drug started to take some effect. I sat down in the same place as the night before and began to read a bit. Tracers and some other subtle visual effects combined with racing thoughts made it slightly hard to read, although less boring than the the previous night. Frustrated with my obstructed reading ability I decide to do the opposite, write. I write two psycotropic-inspired songs – I also had music written for them both, in my head – but upon sitting in front of a keyboard, I realized that the songs were in a key that doesn’t exist:

“The Days/Daze”

it’s not a cry for attention
it’s a whimper for rejection
A second wind as short as the last
I can’t have a future if I don’t have a past
The streets pain flows through me
In legatto elegance
You know, I used to have a reason
That is, beyond deliverance
Fleeting memories in a time that’s self-cautious
Instead of finding the problem
They simply buried it
it’s a dirty world
yet our fates are so sterile
nowhere else to go
our purpose has been filed

the bright city lights
shine on our dirty city dreams
based on shitty fabrications
of a city puking you to be clean
the gutter glory hole
where sympathy blows my soul
back handed genorosity
leave me shameless and cold
taken away, the days when I used to be clean
I used to be clean

The run down shops
Where I can browse my broken options
I run round in circles
The states broken adoption

“Nothing”

nothing left do do but nothing
nothing left to say but nothing
nothing left to want but nothing
nothing left to have but nothing
nothing left to be but nothing
nothing left to leave but nothing
nothing left to sing but nothing
nothing left to scream but nothing
nothing left to see but nothing
nothing left in me but nothing
do… nothing
say… nothing
want… nothing
have… nothing
be… nothing
leave… nothing
sing… nothing
scream… nothing
see… nothing
in me… nothing
nihl zero negative!
There’s nothing in you
Don’t let it live.

I run into some punk girl I had met before named Molly with her boyfriend. Her boyfriend is in a Nile shirt so I decide he’s cool. Molly is on acid, apparently – so we connect. We wonder around a bit vandalizing the odd sign. Then I leave. I show up at my mom’s at 7am with a mild after-glow. “What” she says… “I want some cereal” I reply.
I eat a bowl of some Fudge Swirl shit and then lay on the couch and watch a documentary on the Ku Klux Klan. Apparently, when it started it was just a club – it had no racist-ties… Weird. I fall asleep and my mom wakes me saying “you’re not supposed to be sleeping here! I leave.

Thursday:
Derek has returned so marijuana and liquer are the focus of the night at Kyle’s. At around 11pm I show up at my mom’s drunk and ask her to hook me up with some food. I eat left-over sausage, steak and taco meet. A wonderfully varied, carnivourous meal.
I leave my mom’s and wander into victoria park. I decide to capitalize upon my drunkeness and it’s ability to make me not give a fuck about where I sleep. I find a park bench that is obscured by bushes and lay down. A few ‘shady’ characters walk by and I’m afraid I’ll get beat up or robbed. Luckily, noone goes as low as to rob or beat up a homeless guy. I eventually pass out.
The cops wake me up some time later. I give them a fake name, knowing full well that they would turn my park bench sleeping into “disturbing the peace” and arrest me for breach of probation. On top of that, I’m supposed to inform my probation officer upon any change of address. They don’t accept “homeless” – they’d make me go to the house of friendship. I would rather sleep on a bench then sleep there. Too many shady characters – not to mention an 11pm curfiew. Luckily, they buy the fake name, and let me off saying I can’t sleep on a bench. It disgusts me how the country criminalizes homelessness, a problem they helped fucking create.
I wander back downtown and look at the clock – it’s 4:30 – I managed to sleep about four hours, which means I only have three more to kill until a few buisnesses open. I sit and read, finishing Please Kill Me.

Friday:
Sometime, somehow Thursday night I seem to have severely injured the right side of my ass. My guess is it’s from long periods of sitting where my wallet was digging into it. I’m bruised and my hip bone hurts like a bitch to sit or walk. Eitherway, I walk to Waterloo, smoke some weed then go to the library. After spending some time there, fucking around online – I head downtown. I start panhandling – something I don’t do very often. It’s a bad day for panhandling and I only make about 4 dollars in two hours. I use this money to buy a hotdog.
There’s some stupid car show downtown that I refer to as a “mid-life crisis parade” – after watching a bit of this, I head to kyle’s. We smoked some weed with Trotsky-Mike and I passed out on his couch for a couple hours. Surprisingly, Kyle was nice enough to let me sleep there. I woke up to the house being full of people – Derek, Femme-Casey and Michelle had showed up. I felt akward for having been asleep the whole time.
Since my parents were away, I called my sister and harassed her to let me stay there the night. It took some convincing, but she let me. I make a huge fucking chocolate milkshake then go to bed.

eden_rose @ 2006-07-11T15:37:00

2006-07-11T19:36:51Z

just got back in town.
life is kinda gay.
have a new song on http://www.myspace.com/thedisorientedfront

THE DISORIENTED FRONT

2006-07-02T00:38:51Z

At long last I have written a song for my long pending project, The Disoriented Front...
It's a slightly different direction from Eden Rose...
http://www.myspace.com/thedisorientedfront
Feedback is welcome.